9 days left

i can't stop counting the days.9 days left to 17th dec 2009.hell yeah!! he'll comin back frm L.A to jakarta.

you know what?i'm worrying bout him,how he lost his weight and it made me speechless.it's not because i dun want he looks more than the last time i met him.but it's because he is unhealty,he's sick.how he tried to lose his weight,consume vagetable everyday,and exercising everyday.i can't stop blaming myself i'm not there when he needed me.

then what i'm thinking now is,

i can't stop crying if i remembered bout us.when he said,we're not meant to be together.

i knew dii,If we're not meant to be together,what should I suppose to do lose this feelin?

I'm so sad if I remembering bout that.

so sad if i remembering how u had a fight with your father,caused he didn't like me,at all..

it's hurtful,when i heard u say,"shir udahan yah.."

i can't stop trying to reach u back.

it's killin me to see u go away.it's not easy dii.it's not easy.

and when sitting in front of a mirror,i cried.why?

it's hurtful,when i remembering our memories.when u hugged me,and saw our reflection.how happy i am.

when we spent 5 days together.

when we chatted,we laughed,we cried..

when u give me that rose..

when i saw u go after u took me home,and you hugged me in front my house.left my house,left me.

it's hurful,when imagined what will i feel after 2 weeks later?..

all i can do is just close my eyes.and crying.